iShare : Behind Every Great Man

Calvin : Funny?
Hobbes : Seriously, yes.
Calvin : Clever? Smart?
Hobbes : Yup.
Calvin : Says who?
Hobbes : Susie, I guess.

I read, I smiled, I read again, I smiled again. And so what do I do? I spread the good joke. ^^

Behind Every Great Man

One night President Obama and his wife Michelle decided to do something out of routine and went for a casual dinner at a restaurant that wasn't too luxurious. 

When they were seated, the owner of the restaurant asked the president's secret service if he could please speak to the First Lady in private. They obliged and Michelle had a conversation with the owner. 

Following this conversation President Obama asked Michelle, why was he so interested in talking to her. She mentioned that in her teenage years, he had been madly in love with her. 

President Obama then said, "So if you had married him, you would now be the owner of this lovely restaurant," to which Michelle responded, "no, if I had  married him, he would now be the President."

iShare : 5-Minute Management Course

Finally, it's weekend! Yipee! My to do list for these two days : continue to work hard to make the necessary changes, for a better today, for a brighter future. Fingers crossed.

Hey, anyone feels like attending a course during this weekend? Hmmm, guess no huh? But what if the course only takes 5 minutes, and it's online, and it's free, and all you've got to do is to read this post? Hehe, sorry, I was being silly. Actually I have some interesting short stories to share, stories from one of those circular emails I received. I particularly like these few stories because they are wickedly funny, yet rather true and meaningful at the same time.

So have fun reading! And blessed weekend to all!

p/s: please pardon some choice of words used by the author in the following 'lessons'.

5-Minute Management Course (Author unknown)

Lesson 1

A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower, when the doorbell rings.

The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs.

When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next-door neighbor.

Before she says a word, Bob says, 'I'll give you $800 to drop that towel.'

After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob.

After a few seconds, Bob hands her $800 and leaves.

The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs.

When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks, 'Who was that?'

'It was Bob the next door neighbor,' she replies.

'Great,' the husband says, 'did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?'

Moral of the story:
If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a position to prevent avoidable exposure.

Lesson  2

A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out.

The Genie says, 'I'll give each of you just one wish.'

'Me first! Me first!' says the admin clerk. 'I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world.'

Puff! She's gone.

'Me next! Me next!' says the sales rep. 'I want to be in Hawaii , relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my life.'

Puff! He's gone.

'OK, you're up,' the Genie says to the manager.

The manager says, 'I want those two back in the office after lunch.'

Moral of the story:
Always let your boss have the first say.

Lesson  3

An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing.

A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, 'Can I also sit like you and do nothing?'

The eagle answered: 'Sure, why not.'

So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested.

All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.

Moral of the story: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.

Lesson  4

A turkey was chatting with a bull.

'I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree,' sighed the turkey, 'but I haven't got the energy.'

'Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?' replied the bull. 'They're packed with nutrients.'

The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree.

The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch.

Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree.

He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree.

Moral of the story:
Bull Shit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.

Lesson  5

A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field.

While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him.

As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was. The dung was actually thawing him out!

He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy.

A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate.

Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.

Morals of the story:

a) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy.

b) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.

c) And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth shut!

Remembering Mother's Words

I remember coming home one day and found this piece of note on my desk. That was almost three years back. My mother wrote this down to remind me and to encourage me, to be positive at.all.times, no matter what happens.

In life, there are bound to be ups and downs. But let us remember, to give thanks in good times, and to not loose hope in bad times.

On the countless sleepless nights, like this night, as I ponder upon my life, I think I have failed miserably, in every aspect of life. I need to make some changes and restructure my life, fast, now. You'll never know when too late is too late, until it's already too late. I hope for a better today, I strive for a better today, for myself, for my family, for the people I love.

In my weakness and helplessness, I thank God that I'm not alone, He is with me, He is my strength. Though I may wander away at times, yet He is faithful, always. And thus, I will keep on P.U.S.H-ing {Pray Until Something Happens}, with unwavering faith.

It's dark, she's lost

She is having some very difficult time in her life. Her life is not a bed of roses at the moment, and weirdly, it is neither bushes full of prickly thorns. In her own words, her life is like ... a vacuum of space.

She wakes up each morning, dreading what the day may brings. Which, most of the time, nothing. It is mentally torturing, emotionally draining, physically weakening to live a life with no excitement, no goals, no passion, no purpose, no motivations, no dreams, no hopes ... nothing, total emptiness.

She feels bad, and tired, and defeated. She is finding it harder and harder to talk to anyone, and sadly, this anyone includes God. Sometimes, the feeling of sorrow and hopelessness is so great and suffocating that she wished she could just end her life. But, I thank God that she, being a Christian for all these years, understands that commiting suicide is an absolute NO-NO, and life does not end by just leaving this earthly world.

Life still goes on for her, one painful step at a time. In her lost world, she sees nothing but total darkness, she hears nothing but deafening silence, she feels nothing but complete emptiness.

Today, when I looked into her eyes, I saw nothing but a soul silently crying out for help, and that breaks my heart. Lord, help me help her!